Make clear your feelings about them beforehand. Tell him you have something you want to talk about with them, and ask that they keep an open mind. As young people have increasingly blurred the lines between friendship and sexual expression, this dilemma has become common, leaving parents bewildered as to who is friend and who is dating partner. Just weigh the risks and benefits before deciding whether to give it a shot.
Make clear your feelings about them beforehand. Tell him you have something you want to talk about with them, and ask that they keep an open mind. Make sure you listen to their response. So, I agree with Gabe that clarity of purpose is critical before, during and after any line-blurring occurs. Just weigh the risks and benefits before deciding whether to give it a shot. Just as in a male-female friendship, keeping feelings bottled up often leads to tension. People actually do the thing Gabe recommends — communicate. For the emotional health of you and your friendship, it would be best for you to come forward with your feelings. What do you recommend? As young people have increasingly blurred the lines between friendship and sexual expression, this dilemma has become common, leaving parents bewildered as to who is friend and who is dating partner. If one of my friends had feelings for me, I would want them to approach me in this way rather than another. It is possible that your friend will react negatively, but I doubt they will. Keep in mind that the decision to advance is theirs alone. Their parents may not approve and they should advance at a pace they feel comfortable with. Double Take opinions and advice are not a substitute for psychological services. Proceed to express the thoughts you articulated earlier. What exactly are they — romantic, sexual or something else? If you decide to tell your friend the feelings you have for them, you would be best served to approach them privately, without jumping straight into the topic. This tension appears unprovoked and may scar the friendship far worse than any awkwardness. If you do end up as a couple, congrats. As interesting as it may sound to cross romantic lines with same or opposite sex friends, it often leaves teens in asynchronous relationships in which one party is very emotionally connected and the other is just exploring. Send your confidential word question to ask dr-wes. This was the second of two essays prompts Gabe wrote on during the Double Take contest, so the question was developed for that purpose. If you would be fine staying just friends, let them know. Gabe Magee is a Bishop Seabury Academy senior. Honesty is the best policy, especially when it comes to friendships.
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